i tried to tell the photographer that it violated my tribal religious beliefs

but they took the picture anyways.


Im sort of a big deal in the bike service game, you might have noticed. Yes, when you hear a creaking in your bottom bracket, i will personally call your ass out by getting you to come out into the africa heat to make the sound for me in your wool slacks and penny loafers, as pictured here:

and god forbid you drag me all the way outside to make the noise for me and your bike "isn't making it out here....wierd."

then i have to explain to you that the $250.00 you spent to shave the 68 grams on your ti-spindled pedals, may well be the reason for the noise seeing as you way 195 pounds and the pedals have a 158 pound rider weight limit. How about you do an extra lap on sunset once a week for a year and save yourself a whole 5 pounds, for free!

Training and technical advice. Now that's what i call service.